As you may, or possibly not, know. I became a dad for the second time. It was a shock to the system, having 9 months to come to terms with it is not long enough. Admittedly, I spent 8 and a half months with my head in a bucket of sand waiting for it all to go away.

My first child is now nearly 4, (August) and he already has the patter of a grifter trying to smooth talk his way into getting a Spiderman web making wrist toy as a present.

That leaves my wife and I. To sum up, we are both completely bolloxed. Most of our nights are spent feeding and changing. This is an issue for me. I am not a night person, no matter how hard I try I cannot stay awake. Therefore I constantly run the risk of accidentally dropping the child down the back of a cupboard, using her as a pillow or repeatedly tapping her on the head wondering why she wont switch to snooze mode. The problem is that because I don’t contribute as much as I would like, I cannot complain about how tired I feel without getting the “glare”. Other dads with tired partners know what I mean. That cold, hard look which says “Say another word and I will rip you limb for limb”.

It is a well known, medically proven fact that tiredness has far reaching affects with respect to general health and personal well being. Forgetfulness, low tolerance threshold, lower level of personal hygiene. I cannot remember how many days I have had these socks on for. Its not because I am too tired to reach into my sock drawer. But more that I simply couldn’t care less if my feet hum a bit. I am unshaven, wearing the same jogging bottoms and my hair has decided to style itself.

Tiredness also plays with your mind and the perception of your immediate surroundings. For example, a cloth used to clean work surfaces is left crumpled next to the kitchen sink. Normally, I wouldn’t notice it. Today, it looked like a small Buddha looking at his feet. A roll of paper on my desk looks like a pair of binoculars and my headphones remind me of Princess Lea.

You become tetchy at everything and everyone. Driving around Leicester can be testing at times, Leicester drivers are considered to be the worst on the planet. Well, by me they are. Every driver stereotype can be found here. From annoying company car drivers to 4 foot women in off-road land rover jeeps. The north of Leicester seems to be in a state of permanent highway regeneration. There is barely a major road which isn’t undergoing some form or repair. So naturally, I have a lot to shout about, and at. This may be normal, or it may stem from tiredness. Ask my wife, and she would concur that I generally am a grumpy old sod regardless of my energy levels.

I need some sleep. (and apparently a shower)